| PG gets introspective |
God, where to begin? The last couple das have been trying to say the least. Anna was in a car crash, I don't want to go into details (mostly because I'm not too sure about them, myslef), but the bottom line is shes going to be okay. That is, shes not going to die or anything.
Yesterday, work was hell and I was almost positive that I was going to be fired. Screw you bitchy trainee girl. Thank you awesome team leader girl, Rackeb and Bess. You guys made work bearable. I miss everyone, yet I don't want to see anyone. I want to be alone, but with everyone at once. Well, maybe not everyone. I want to be with my friends. Seeing Isy yesterday made me remember how much I love her and how much I've missed everyone over the summer. I know I shouldn't be saying this, but I miss school. I miss having stucture. I miss having a locker and hearing get to class music, I miss seeing my friends everyday, I miss booking it to class, I miss grumpy teachers, I miss getting tests back, I miss gross cafetreria food, I miss singning every other day, I miss learning!! God, I miss it all. I miss my friends and going to Timothy's after school and being worried that I'm going to get the shit kicked out of me for being late home (again). I miss it and I love it and I can't wait until it starts again. I know I'm going to be stressed out and when it gets to be exam time, I'm going to want to shoot myslef for saying this, but yeah I miss it. One thing I don't miss is homework, if they could have everything else and eliminate the homework and assignments and exams, that'd be ideal. I feel lonely and I don't feel like theres anyone I trust completely and I don't think I ever will find someone. That makes me so sad and full of despair. How can I ever be truly in love, truly give my heart away if I can naver trust someone completely. I have all these thoughts swirling around in my head and I have no idea how to get them out. Even if I could figure out how to express them, I have no idea who I would express them to. These thoughts are like parasites, slowly eating away at my sanity. I try to get them out, I try to kill them, but the more I try to get rid of them the more aggressive and destructive they get. ~ PenguinGirl gets introspective |
